The Bathtime Mishap
by StandingOnTheRooftops
Summary: One-shot. Just for humor. Yuri tries to take a bath- easier said than done. Flirting women, annoying spiders, ear-pulling, and someone gets slapped, just to name a few things. And Yuri gets caught fondling a girl- but it's not what you think! YxW


My very first foray into the world of KKM! (LOL, my first fic that's not Gundam Wing oriented!)

Dedicated to DaughterSkyVanny, for introducing me to this wonderful show!!

Summary: In which Yuritries to take a bath, fondles a girl, is accused of cheating, and summarily causes a woman's dreams to come true. Only.... it's not what it seems! LOL! (poor Yuri. Nothing ever goes well for him!)

Warnings: Um... not much. Jelous Wolfram, flirty girls, annoying spiders, blatant Mary-Sues(so sue me... it's for humor!), feeble attempts at making you laugh, mild nudity, and very, very mild sexual situations. Rated T pretty much to be safe. This is my first KKM story, and I haven't watched very much of the show, so please forgive any mistakes and please let me know. Reviews are cherished... even if it's just to tell me I suck! This is purely for fun and shouldn't be taken seriously... if you want a serious fic... go read 'How To Save A Life'!

Disclaimer: I don't own KKM! I don't even own Vanny!!!! (except for when I can bribe her using cookies!!! ^^)

**_The Bath-time Mishap (also entitled 'The Maou Tries To Take A Bath')_**

Yuripeered into the steamy bath room. There were no sounds, and he sighed in releif as he walked fully into the room, ridding himself of his robe and slipping down into the warm water.

He smiled blissfully as the warmth eased away the aches and pains that came from the inherent duties of being a Maou.... mainly all that stupid paperwork! He leaned back, eyes closed, as he let the water work it's wonderful magic on him. It wasn't until a minute later that he heard it.

A giggle.

Very worried, he opened his eyes to scan the room. Through the foggy mist, he couldn't see much, though. A small ripple echoed across the water's surface, from the far corner.

"Don't let us disturb you, Heika," came a soft, girly voice, giggling. "We were just admiring the view!"

Yuri groaned. 'We'? At least two reasons for Wolfram to come and jump down his throat about that whole stupid 'cheating' thing.

"Who's there?" He asked. Well... he was already in hot water, so to speak, so why not at least know why his ear would be burning later?

Another laugh, this one older, throatier. Suddenly the steam that hovered above the water was whished away, as if an unfelt breeze blew it; the fog parted right across the middle to reveal two women in the pool. One was but a girl (though that meant nothing age-wise in this messed up wonderland), her black hair plastered down her face and shoulders, and waving about in the water. Electric blue eyes twinkled merrily as their tan-skinned owner smiled at him.

The other was older, more mature. Her hair, pulled into a wavy, curly mass atop her head, was an aquamarine blue that perfectly matched her eyes and looked beautiful against her fair skin, faintly flushed with the heat of the bath. Her hand was held up, almost in a casual, half-wave. It took him a moment to realize she must be a water demon... or an air demon. He held with water simply for the sake of her hair color. She laughed again.

"Why, Heika, does something intrigue you? Staring is most unbecoming."

The younger girl giggled, and blushed red as she sank down further into the water, up to her chin.

The other merely smirked, that mature and knowing smirk when a woman found that a man couldn't keep his eyes off her. She knew very well that she was sitting on the edge of the water, her slim legs dangling in, but the rest of her gloriously nude and out of the water.

Yuri forced himself to tear his eyes away, blushing apple red.

"Um.... uh...ep!" He stuttered, causing the woman to renew her laughter.

"It's quite alright, Heika," she soothed, that smirk still firmly in place as she ran a hand over her bare leg. "Although I think that..."

"Stop teasing," the other girl chided, coming back up, her black hair plastering around her face.

The woman put on a fake pout. "But Vanny..." she drawled, like a whining child.

"Do you have to tease any male thing with two legs?"

The woman nodded happily. "And sometimes more than two legs!"

The dark haired girl groaned. "The company I keep," Yuri heard her mutter to herself.

It was about that time Yuri noticed the dark little shadow dropping from the ceiling. No larger than a strawberry, it was black and fuzzy. It took a moment for Yuri to realize what it was: a spider. He was about to say something to the girls, when the spider dropped.... right into the dark girls hair.

"AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!" the girl, Vanny, screamed as she felt the spider hit her head. The older woman jerked back in surprise, pulling her feet up out of the water and in front of her... effectively abandoning her friend to the feared fuzzy thing. "IT"S A SPIDER, GET IT OFF!!!!"

Without even thinking, Yuri was across the pool in an instant, one hand out to steady the girl and keep her from splashing, the other working it's way into her hair, trying to get the spider. He was positive the thing was harmless... but he wasn't so sure about the girl during a panic attack. He found the spider and tossed it away, towards the corner of the room. Hands on her shoulders, he tried to get the girl to calm down, now that disaster was averted.

Or maybe... it wasn't.

~*~*~*~*~

Wolfram left Quatre, another fire demon, as he opened the door to the baths. He'd spent a good while talking with his distant cousin, but he needed to speak with Yuri.

"Yu...ri?" Wolfram stepped into the room. It took a good moment for his brain to process the fact that his *FIANCEE* was in the pool, hands all over a *GIRL* who was screaming bloody murder and looked close to panicking. Add that to the shocked very *nude* water Mazoku sitting next to them....

"WIMP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!!?????!!!!???!!!"

Yuri jumped, hands dropping away guiltily. "Wolf? It's not what it looks like... I can explain.... there was a spider!"

"I am not falling for that stupid line, you lying, cheating wimp. You are my fiance! Not hers!! Come here!"

Wolf stormed up, reaching out just far enough to grab Yuri's ear.

"OWW!!!" The 27th Maou shrieked.

"Wolfram.... Wolfram!"

"What is it, woman?" He demanded, turning. His hand slipped off of Yuri's ear, and the Maou backed quickly away, out of reach. Wolfram turned, very surprised to find himself standing almost nose to nose with the water demon... the naked water demon. She stood, a few inches taller than him, and smiled charmingly as she shrugged into a sheer, silky aqua blue robe.

"Heika was correct. It's all a simple mis-understanding. There *was* a spider, and Vanny panicked."

"I did not panic, Jezzy," the girl pouted.

"Vanny panicked and Heika was merely *helping*."

"That still doesn't mean he can put his hands on someone else!" Wolfram growled. "He is a cheating whimp, and I..."

"Would it help if matters were evened out?" The aqua haired Mazoku asked, growing impatient. Sure, everyone knew of the ex-prince's jealousy thing, but really... enough was enough.

"Huh?" Wolfram demanded only seconds before cool lips were pushed against his own. He was forced back, the taller, older demon wrapping her arms around him and dipping him back as she deepened the kiss. Then, suddenly, he was upright and floundering.

He.... he just.... he kissed a girl!

Yuri and Vanny stared in shock, Yuricoming and getting up out of the water and grabbing a towel. Yuricouldn't quite name the feeling inside him, but he was loath to call it jelousy. He was the Maou, and he didn't like other people kissing what was *his*.

Vanny was torn between outrage and laughter, but she settled for the laughter... the look on Wolfram's face was akin to a fish out of water. His mouth opened, but his voice wouldn't work.

Jezzy the water deamon smiled brightly. "See? Now the score has been evened out and you two can't fight!" As if nothing had happened, she grabbed a sapphire blue robe and held it out to the girl. "Come on, Vanny. Let's go!"

Vanny shrugged quickly into the robe as she scrambled out of the pool. They were half-way to the doors when the two came face to face with a blond haired, blue eyed fire deamon.

"Quatre," Jezzy chirruped happily upon seeing her long-time friend.

Quatre had know for many, many years that he liked the aqua-haired demon, but was very loath to make any move... least it be rejected. But seeing her kissing someone else... even in jest- and even the king's fiance... had him livid. His hand struck out, the flat of his palm connecting with the woman's left cheek. Hard enough to leave a fair red tint to the fair skin, but light enough not to harm.

Yuri and Wolfram stared on in mild shock, and Vanny looked completely pole-axed.

Jezzy's eyes darkened for a moment, but then she smiled.

"It took you long enough," she happily said, tossing her arms around the fire Mazoku as she pulled him towards the door.

Vanny looked after them, finally regaining her senses.

Aww.... If Jezzy married Quatre, then she wouldn't have as much time to spend with her best friend. But then, another thought hit her. If Jezzy married Quatre, Vanny could go to Quatre's mansion with them. Vicky was there and would be loads of fun to hang around with! And plus... Jezzy's violet-eyed, chest-nut haired cousin was bound to be around for the wedding... right? Vanny grinned at the thought.

She bounced happily out of the room, wondering how long Yuri and Wolfram's issues would stay solved. Knowing Wolfram, she guessed, it wouldn't be....

"WHIMP!!!! Why DIDN"T YOU STOP HER FROM KISSING ME?!?!?!?!" echoed through the castle, just before a loud splash.

Vanny smiled. Cheri-sama would certainly want to hear of this.


End file.
